Some revelations and roadmap in several ways

Not sure why I've waited so long, nor do I know what this truly means, but it's all coming together.  This is partly due to experiences have had the last month or so, and riding horses, and work I have coming up soon to remedy some things...

Spot where The Meaning materialized

As I left Tacoma, WA, and the great people at Bay Engine and Truck Repair, I took a quick swing over to the Oregon Coast, where I experienced The Meaning.  This meaning, which I haven't been able to fully describe, and I still can't fully describe, started in these two pictures.  What a beautiful and idyllic place it is.

From where I took this first picture, it points to almost the exact location where was swallowed in fog, with feet in the surf, and lost in thoughts.  There's a little stream / river coming from the wood nearby that cuts along the beach and goes into the surf.  This is also the point where The Meaning started to gel, two years prior.  Before this it was a little weird and spooky walking into the clouds to follow the surf and seemed just like a normal stroll.  Turned into anything but a normal stroll, something that defines some purpose to my life.

In distance, on right, before green patch, people played volleyball

This second picture followed the little river, bypassing the volleyball game that a group was playing.  From what I remember there wasn't anyone playing when went into the surf.  It was on this walk back, where I was walking in slow motion, not quite sure of how to digest everything.

After exited the fog bank that day, it cleared up to almost what it shows in these pictures, but little less cloudy, well, lot less cloudy.  It was as if the cloud bank was there for a purpose, then vanished as the purpose ended.  It felt so soothing, comforting, and all that other happy happy joy joy stuff.

Even after two years can still remember most of the details, which is very surprising for me.

Spent about twenty minutes visiting here and had to leave as came from Tacoma, WA and wanted to get on other side of I5 before nightfall.  Made it to Walmart in Bend, OR. Was a long day of driving, but it really felt good to be on the road.  I mean it REALLY felt good.

The following day made it to Montichello, UT, and spent the night in a truck stop / Seven Eleven there.  One spot was left available, right in front of a light pole, in which the RV fit perfectly.  Really needed that.  I mean REALLY needed that. Though, this is funny, on the map, it shows as a Shell station and not a Seven Eleven..  Even google isn't right all the time.

Woke up around 6 am and immediately hit the road.  Got near my destination, had breakfast, and toodled around until 10 or 11 a.m., then went to some friends, with the horses!

While driving had some thoughts, especially the last day.

Some realizations

Over the last 3-4 weeks, ever since trying to leave Vashon and being delayed with that oil leak, have come to the realization as to why relationships are very important in life, like husband / wife, boyfriend / girlfriend, significant other, or whatever suits your boat.  Have had many lows, and many other things where it would've been soo much better with someone close to bring me back to reality so much sooner.  For my whole life have always respected those relationships, but never could see myself in one, for the most part, until now.  This is a part of The Meaning.

Another realization is that I really hate hills, and going up them in the RV, in it's current form, is truly painful.  This was the cause of MUCH ANGST on my part for this trip, and helped me form the above realization as two, or more, minds are better than one.

When got to my destination, and thinking back on what happened, such as going up hills on I70 @ 30-35 MPH, and even slower when got off the highway.  I think there are a couple reasons for this.

• Am supposed to keep exhaust temperature below 1300 degrees Farenheit, so always let up on the throttle and downshift manually
• Had very dirty air filter (K&N reuseable), so cleaned and reoiled.  Was full of oily diesel bypass stuff (no pictures)
• One reason air filter was full of icky stuff is due to no front cover on front part of filter.  Made one out of aluminum and it will work fine (pictures coming)
• Fuel injectors could be a little dirty, Will be adding Marvel Mystery Oil (my neighbor in Connecticut swears by the stuff) to clean it out, next time fill up.  Will keep up this treatment.
• MMO Bottle says to put 4 ounces in for every 10 gallons of fuel, so with a 90 gallon diesel tank, that's about 36 ounces.  They conveniently sell a 32 ounce bottle so will use that for the first fillup, then find a gallon jug elsewhere and fill up little bottle.  This will clean fuel lines and everything
• Replace fuel / water separator as driven at least 20,000 miles (not done yet)
• Replace fuel filter (not done yet)
• Get a Frantz Bypass Oil filter (two actually), and install (not done yet)
  
• Fuse blown on instrument panel lights.  Makes it difficult to see gauges at night.  Will replace fuse, but have to find it, which haven't yet
• As part of replacing the rear main seal, we also fixed exhaust as it was disconnected from exhaust manifold, there was also a little break in the exhaust pipe before the muffler, also patched.  This made exhaust perform not as designed so probably also had some sort of impact, either fouling things up, or a decrease in power.  Will monitor.

I "think", that with a combination of all these steps, the power will return to where it should be, without more indepth maintenance.

The air filter was way past due cleaning so will change that frequency.  Pretty sure the air filter was a BIG contributor to loss of power on the hills, though all the other stuff will help too.  Now I won't, almost literally, lose my mind.  Everything happens for a reasons and pretty sure there's a reason for this.

Another realization is my angst of having to stay in one place, and not being able to get going.  I am still not exactly sure why had to wait, though it helped to instill some patience and the like.

The wait is also another reason I finally came to the realization about a significant other.  I was very anxious to get going as soon as I can, but was delayed for several reasons, and due to a purpose which I have yet to realize.

Had some friends who helped me out by wanting to get me away and doing things, rather than feeling down.  I would have to say was borderline depressed for couple of the nights as was really really wanting to get going, but couldn't, for obvious reasons.

I went to Woo Woo Wednesday, with Skip and Sha'ron, on the night the Rear Main Seal was completed.  This is their website, and it's not laid out really nice, kinda gory IMHO.  They had a lady there who spoke and was spot on with what she told me, and she helped restructure priorities and reaffirmed some things, which will write about later.

Still not ready

While I realize will need a relationship to further myself, and others, the two primary reasons I came to New Mexico are:

• Ride horses
• Clear out some drama

Horse riding is done, and I really really like it.  It's great to interface with such a glorious animal that is very intelligent, and she continually tests me!  Today she started bucking a tiny bit, but I was able to calm her down, still no idea how I did it...  Stayed on the saddle whole time and rode after she calmed down.  Have a great connection with this horse, a thoroughbred mustang, probably with some racing history.  Think she wanted to run, due to her training, yet we were only walking her around, hence excess energy.

The Root

While some, well, most, people will jump to conclusions about clearing out drama, I really have no idea what I need to clear out, only that (woo woo) people have eluded to some emotional blocks needing to be cleared.  This is all related to my root chakra and has to deal with some items that happened in my childhood that they deemed inappropriate.  Not quite sure what that means, but all I know is it's gotta go.  Can feel the blockage even now as I type.

The root chakra is located in general area of where we sit, and it grounds the whole body.  Am thinking that this is one reason have always been a "little" aloof, just floating through life, as didn't really have a grounding due to this energy that's still there blocking all the chakra's above.

I have a great friend here that is a Reiki Master, and will be doing Reiki stuff shortly while here in New Mexico.

I will have to acknowledge what comes up, and then release it, and hold no ill will.  Some have said that it will be rough to do, but have to do it sooner or later.

Engine oil leak...

Engine Oil Leak

General area, engine on left, transmission on right

It all started off as I was getting ready to leave Vashon, in the RV, to attend the monthly scooter meeting.  I backed up to empty my black and grey water tanks with not a care in the world.  Emptied tanks and was putting hose back in, then glanced back and saw a sight that would make anyone shudder..  A nice, steady stream of oil coming from back end of engine...  There was a really good sized puddle on the ground, at least a quart over a 3-5 minutes time frame..  Bad bad thing.

Moved the RV off to the side so could see what happened, and it was at this point that noticed had a steady stream of oil from my parking place to the dump station, then to where I parked.  Again, really not a good sign.  Went to get maintenance guy and we cleaned up the area to help mitigate effects on the environment..  Icky icky icky, but got it done to their liking, which is important!

Point of leak (cleaned up

While on island, some mechanics helped me try and figure this out, and we went with the cheap solution first, which was to simply plug the hole with a 3/4" brass plug.  This worked well, until drove a few miles up and down Vashon Highway (real name, I swear). Once got back and removed the plug, some oil came out, more than just couple drips.  Their thinking was that with the plug missing, oil would follow the easiest path.  Made sense so tried it, and it really didn't work all that well.

I stayed on Vashon Island for couple more days and called around to several garages to see who could fit me in.  Was very close to one place but they wouldn't let me stay in RV and don't really have any other place to stay, especially with two wonderful cats (Scatter and Paisley).  Until I found the one below.  Very happy with them!

Place of leak with oil pan

With the worst fears confirmed, went to Bay Engine and Truck Repair, in the Port of Tacoma area.  I couldn't find a web site for them yet one of the garages recommended them, and they could fit me in fairly early, with a promise to look at it on Thursday.

I must say, overall am very very pleased with the service they gave me!  They're great folks, very knowledgeable, and do great work.  One thing is that they're not really setup to do RV's, or much work underneath vehicles, as they don't have a heavy duty lift, other than those rolling hydraulic pump jacks.  They even let me take pictures of parts of the process, which have included here!

Driveshaft unhooked

I will also HIGHLY Recommend them if anyone needs work done in the area.  Very knowledgeable, very helpful, and all the guys that work there are super.

And, they admit when there's a goober.

The uninstall process went fairly smooth, they had to unhook driveshaft, unhook cables, remove bolts in flywheel / flexplate, and all sorts of other stuff am glossing over, where it seems easy but reality is a different story.  There was a lot of hours done in just removing things.  Putting together was quicker, but still unexpected things always happen.

Transmission / Engine seperated

Next major milestone was removal of all bolts, and removal of transmission from the engine flywheel.  That made me happy!

This opened up where the bad gasket was.  Removing the gasket was fairly easy.  They had a nifty little tool that was able to pull it out.  Not sure what the tool is named, but it had a little slide hammer, with a screw on one end which went into the old gasket.  They then slid hammer portion and it pulled out the old seal.

Now, this is where the little goober happened, and extra effort, and some more parts, needed.

After removing the seal, there was what seemed like another gasket there that needed to be removed, and mechanic thought it was welded in place with some type of epoxy or something.  Spent some time trying to chip away, only to realize they were chipping away at the rear cover, which houses the rear main seal (ebay link).  The part number is 3921043, for a Cummins diesel.  Couldn't really find a different link.

Due to this, had to drop oil pan, remove some engine mounts, replace couple more gaskets, do some extra cleaning, and all that happy fun fun stuff. 

The all important Rear Main Seal in the middle

This extra work was a mixed blessing in a way..  It added some extra time to the project, more time than I really wanted, yet it also allowed me to change the engine oil, which have been meaning to.  Didn't expect to replace all the other gaskets, such as oil pan gasket, rear cover gasket, and some type of seal kit (not these seals either).

Putting it together was pretty easy and it went together fairly quickly overall.  We had to replace a band clamp as the exhaust pipe was totally disconnected from exhaust manifold, yet most of the exhaust did go through exhaust pipe, some didn't, which probably affected a lot of things.  This band clamp was a royal pain to put in.

After it was all assembled, drove RV around for a little bit, and no more oil leak!  Went to local truck stop and spent the night so they could verify in the morning.  The following morning, as I arrived, it was sprinkling.  Soon as mechanic crawled under it started raining..  Bummer bummer.  He gave the job a clean bill of health and off I went!

Now, the bill..  Total was $2,642.25.  It seems like a lot, and it is, but seeing as this is the only real true repair have had to do it really isn't all that bad.  Diesel engines run forever and are cheap on maintenance, but, when maintenance is done, it really adds up.  Still, over two years or so, that's pretty inexpensive and now it's good for another 20 years, or until an alternate form of propulsion comes along.

Transmission oil leak...

Transmission Oil Leak

Leak around bolt on top

 It took me awhile to realize exactly how bad it was, i.e. 1,000 miles or so, though knew I was leaking transmission oil.  Now, much to my chagrin, and looks to be no long lasting damage, but was running super low on transmission fluid due to the leak.  When looking under this is what I saw.

Bolt location prior to checking

From what I could see, and from what I now know, there is a bolt head on top, and a washer below, where the leak originates.  Upon talking with some mechanics I know on the island (Vashon Island), they informed me that this is an alternate fill tube location for the transmission.  There's indications that a similar thing is on other side, but instead of a bolt and washer, fill tube, with dipstick, is there.  I didn't look on other side as that wasn't leaking, right here is leaking.

Now, what it turned out to be, and no idea how long it was like this, is this bolt was loose, very very very loose..  Did I say very?  Turned it quite a few turns by my fingers alone, which isn't a really good sign.

Tight, clean, leak free!

With this revelation it was time to tighten it and add oil.  Prior to this had picked up a gallon of ATF (Automatic Transmission Fluid), as it was cheaper to buy by the gallon.  Turns out I added the whole gallon (four quarts) and that made it go to the tippy top.

Final note on this.  I knew before hand, but somehow didn't remember (surprising, right?), that automatic transmissions need to be checked while engine is idling and transmission is NOT in gear (neutral).  Turns out I was checking fluid level while engine was off, just like we do engine oil.  Bad move, real bad move.  Had thought it was overfull, and prior to Vashon had thought it was in the normal range, until I kept seeing fluid showing up under transmission, especially when parked on odd angles.  Word to the wise, check transmission fluid dipstick on level ground, with engine running, in idle mode, for couple minutes.  Clean stick off, insert, check, and done.

My first horse ride!

One of my things for coming to New Mexico this time was to ride a horse, and by golly, I did just that.  Was splendid and wonderful having such a powerful, and intelligent, animal to interface with.

Have had relations with this horse for a week or so, feeding her, giving her treats, and even watching her poo and pee, they're not shy of anything.

Her name is Copper, and we've gotten to know each other quite well.  She especially likes it when I come over and snuggle a little prior to giving some treats.  Am still analyzing what happened but really had fun.  Copper seems to be a thoroughbred and was trained very well prior to her going to the rescue.  She's leading a really great life here!  A really great life, especially with all the "candy" (alfalfa) that she's given!

One thing I was told, and am sure there are differing opinions, but horses expect a leader, a true leader.  It was a little shaky at first, but I was able to control her fairly well.  Was on Copper for about 15-20 minutes and had a splendid time, though almost got decapitated before it finally sunk in on what I had to do.  We were going towards the shelter at a good clip, and well, she wouldn't listen to me until I put some meaning behind my voice, which was unusual for me.  Very great learning experience.

Horses continually test us to make sure we're still worthy of riding, and maintaining a leadership position.  It's just in their nature.

Another point, which I handled fairly well, is she got startled by another horse in an adjoining pasture.  She quickly spun around and I was a little shaken though was able to remain seemingly calm while getting her to stop and relax.

It's one thing to watch a horse in the pasture, another to watch it being ridden, and still another to feel a living being underneath you.  With every breath she takes I could feel all her muscles moving, could tell when she breathed in, held her breath, and released it.  I think, after a little learning period, she seemed content, and confident, in my abilities to lead her.


When got off of Copper, my knees seemed weak but I felt good, even just had a chill go up my spine over to my right shoulder..  Really felt like we connected.  Onto more tests tomorrow.

Prior to getting to the pictures, have a lead on place in the area to get some unpasteurized milk, goat or cow.  Can't really drink regular pasteurized cow milk anymore, it tastes too weird though I was brought up on that. But, it's really for my two cats, really, I swear that they'll drink some...  Honestly..  I know you believe me, really I do...

Copper showing off, definitely a riding horse, almost a show horse?  Looks beautiful!

Copper prior to me riding.  Seemed little difficult to switch riders on her.  Beautiful eyes

Copper and I about 1/2 way through.  She really is wonderful

My favorite picture!  She's very beautiful, and looks relaxed, yet alert!

A view of copper after I exited the saddle.  Was wonderful

On the road again, well, almost

Sooo, great news for me, albeit a little delayed, and it being the start of Mercury Retrograde has me a little concerned, but not overly so...

It's time to get the show on the road..  Repairs are done..  While the repair itself wasn't exactly cheap, over the time I've been traveling, it works out to be about $100+ / month...  Still not good for such a lump sum all at once, but that's pretty cost effective, much better than payment on a new RV, or a mortgage!  Will be doing a full write-up on what was done AFTER get to where am going...  Really, really delayed, but there's a reason why am delayed, and that might just be due to going to Woo Woo Wednesday again.  Got some insight on things I urgently need to take care of, I mean urgently, else we might be talking from the other side...

My plans are to head south, then east, then who knows where after that.  Probably west again though could head to East coast, depends on what parents are doing for the winter, and how long they're doing what they're doing...  Parents are unpredictable, at least they're around.

And, that reminds me...  This coming weekend my dad is having a reunion of sorts, a class reunion, of those in the general vicinity of 80 years old.  My hats go out to him, and everyone in his class, who've made it this far.  They're hanging around for a reason too as he thought he'd be a goner in his 60's.

Need to write in my journal, then take a nap.  Most likely will make a quick jaunt to the coast soon to dip toes in the ocean, sit and relax a little, and begin the cleansing process...

Best wishes to everyone. and to everyone a great time!

The "almost" part is due to needing to visit mechanic in the morning to verify everything is working as expected and no surprises lie in wait...  It feels good, no leas, scooter is on board, and ready and chomping at the bit to go!

Lessons... Learned... and Learning....

Have had some time to think over the last couple days as been waiting for my rear main seal to be replaced..  It has been a "comedy" of errors lately.  All simple, yet stupid things, that have tested my patience and delayed my urgent feeling / need to get on the road.

My main disappointment is not being able to get on the road from what I deem an acceptable time period in which to fix what needs to be fixing.  There are some lessons to be learned from this, for me and others.

First is I need to depend on others, tough as it might be.  This is something which I've always had trouble doing, and it's even more difficult now.

Second is that I can't show how upset I really am to the people who I must depend on.  This, in my mind, only aggravates the situation.

Third is dealing with the delays, oversights, and mistakes that happen, at the least inopportune times.

Fourth is putting forward a happy face while dealing with utter disappointment at not being able to advance at a more reasonable pace.  This is closely related to the second item.

Fifth is finding silver lining, a reason why I have to stay in the area.  There's a reason, always a reason, that things like this happen and continually plague us when we have to wait.  Maybe it's a lesson I need to learn, maybe it's a lesson others need to learn, or a combination.

Sixth is making sure things don't get stalled and am doing what I can to help the process along.  Am limited in what I can do, but pitch in wherever I can to streamline things / make it easier.

Overall am elated things are still moving forward, and even today there was forward movement.  So far I don't think it's the fault of anything in particular, just a slew of things went awry in all the wrong sequence, like a perfect storm, or a perfect learning opportunity.

Beer is still safely in the fridge, unopened, and awaiting for me to give it away to a lucky recipient, though thought was there it wouldn't be given away.

Engine and delays

Friday was a rough day for me, Friday night specifically, after came to the realization that couldn't get on the road till at least Monday night.  Am sure there's a reason why I need to spend more time in this area.

Found out the reason I needed to stay on Vashon and come to repair place Wednesday night. As was nearing garage remembered there was a showcase of sorts, so stopped in and talked with a good friend that did a Celtic Cross spread on me.  He awakened me to some actions I really need to take, otherwise more excellent things will slip by.  I generally lead my life in that the important things will land in my lap, slap me in the face, and be obnoxious until I recognized said thing.  He advised me that this was not the case..  WHEN they appear I need to reach out and grab those items in life that are dearest to me..  Another aspect of The Meaning, and another reason why I NEED to go to New Mexico, to clear things up.

So, my "new" plan is...

• Get rear main seal replaced (Monday with any luck)
• Begin traveling 3-4 hours a day to New Mexico, as work permits
• Make side trip to Oregon coast (feel strong urge for the ocean, burrow feet down into sand in the surf and hear it crashing to shore)
• Continue to New Mexico

The sadness I felt was very great and very deep.  Had a super strong desire to leave, and still have desire.  The sadness I felt is still with me, and felt very similar to sadness I had when lost Pia and Mia.  Really really not sure why this delay hit me so hard.

The garage and mechanics here are great, it's a tough and labor intensive job, they even let me peek and poke, which is interesting.  More stuff to write about.

So far, from what I've seen, they've had to do the following (Cliff notes version):

• Disconnect wiring harnesses
• Disconnect hoses
• Drain transmission oil
• Unhook transmission cooler lines (actually had to remove "faceplate" from transmission instead of hoses, due to super tight fittings)
• Move away exhaust (see below)
• Disconnect drive shaft (took 45+ minutes by itself, very very tight fit (good sometimes, not here))
• Remove bolts inside flywheel / torque converter housing (little peephole to remove them, and not THAT type of peephole)
• Remove bolts on flywheel / torque converter housing that secures transmission to it

Drive shaft unhooked

Went to Harmon Tap Room, for lunch and a small pizza when got a call from garage as was pulling into parking lot there (came over helmet).  The exhaust was HOT to the touch after engine was off 3-4 hours...  puzzling...

Long story short, they spent some time diagnosing it and found that the cable from battery to starter was resting on the exhaust, and can guess the rest from there.  They also identified that the exhaust pipe was broken at the flair fitting coming out of the exhaust manifold (a guess on location).

Cable to the starter was shorting, and sparking, on the exhaust.  It looks somewhat new and don't think it was there for too long otherwise would've expected more damage to the wire, and worn down batteries.  My thoughts are it was hanging on just barely, then slight movement of things and it fell.  I wrapped it in several layers (5 or so) of electrical tape and am waiting for reinstall of transmission.  While electrical tape isn't heat resistant am thinking it'll at least help.  Probably best to get some shrink tubing as wire will still go over exhaust pipe.

Broken pipe I somewhat new about, as there is a flex pipe that was busted (have patch but never patched it).  Will get some of the parts to fix it to save them time.  Time is very critical now but it still needs to be done properly..

Will await Monday morning...  8 am...